Brief Vignettes for Psychological Skills Identification Practice
Someone thinks the other person is driving too fast. The person talks calmly and politely with the other person and they agree on a plan.
Good joint decisions or conflict-resolution
Positive fantasy rehearsal
Someone is shoveling their sidewalk, and while they are at it, they shovel their neighbor’s sidewalk as well.
Honesty and nonviolence
Kindness and productivity
Someone has a boyfriend or girlfriend break up with them, but they don’t freak out, and continue getting their work done and having fun with other people.
Fortitude
Conservation
Someone figures out that they need to get more flexible, so they do some stretching each day.
Self-care
Honesty
Someone gets the urge to say, “That’s a stupid idea” to someone else, but instead they say, “Hmm. Here’s another way of looking at this.” And then they tell their ideas.
Productivity
Respectful talk
Someone in school is in the middle of an activity that they don’t want to stop, but when the teacher says, “Put everything away, we’re going to do something else now,” the person does it.
Compliance
Loyalty
Someone is in their last year of high school. The person thinks very carefully about what to do next, gathering information and listing several options and thinking about advantages and disadvantages of the different options.
Good individual decisions
Kindness
Someone turns off the TV and does some studying for a test, even though at the moment it would be more fun to continue watching TV.
Self-discipline
Loyalty
Someone remembers how their grandmom took care of them when they were little. When they are older, they make sure to keep in touch with their grandmom and visit her.
Fortitude
Loyalty
Someone is taking lessons. The teacher says, “How much did you practice since I saw you last?” The person says, “I have to say, I didn’t practice at all.”
Productivity
Honesty
Someone saves money on food by not eating out, avoiding meat, making big pots of vegetable stew that last a long time, and not eating junk food.
Conservation
Respectful talk
Someone gets a lot of pressure from people their age to drink alcohol and use drugs. The person says no, even though the people disapprove.
Courage
Productivity
Someone is going to put on a performance. The person very vividly imagines performing, so as to practice it that way.
Joyousness
Positive fantasy rehearsal
Someone finds a little bird that has fallen out of its nest near where some cats hunt. The person takes the bird in and feeds it and takes care of it till it can fly away on its own.
Kindness
Honesty
Someone invites someone else to go for a walk together, and they chat while they do so.
Compliance
Friendship-building
Someone studies very hard and does lots of experiments to try to find a cure for cancer.
Nonviolence and anger control
Productivity
Someone remembers something good they did, and thinks, “I’m glad I did that!” and feels good.
Joyousness
Self-discipline
Someone doesn’t feel like getting out of bed in the morning, but they get out of bed anyway so as to accomplish what they need to accomplish.
Self-discipline
Positive fantasy rehearsal
Someone listens while someone else talks, and they try to be a good listener, using reflections and follow-up questions and positive feedback.
Nonviolence and anger control
Friendship-building
Election day is coming. Someone reads about the candidates and the issues and reads what wise people have to say about what the government should do.
Loyalty
Good individual decisions
Someone’s neighbor is playing music loudly. The person thinks about calling the person selfish and commanding them to turn it down. Instead, the person says to the neighbor, “I’m going to bed soon, and if the music stays this loud, it will keep me up. Do you have thoughts about this?”
Respectful talk
Productivity
Someone reads about wars going on in other countries. Along with feeling sad that this is happening, the person also thinks, “I am so lucky that my life isn’t being changed by war.” They feel good about their good luck.
Joyousness
Kindness
Someone sees someone else coming toward a door carrying two heavy bags. The person holds the door open for the other person.
Conservation
Kindness
Someone washes the dishes after a family meal, without having been asked to.
Positive fantasy rehearsal
Productivity
Someone’s car won’t start. The person stays cool, and they calmly think about various options for what to do and make a plan, without getting too upset.
Kindness
Fortitude
Someone is alone and doesn’t have anything planned. The person reads a book, and really enjoys reading it.
Respectful talk
Joyousness
Someone is trying to take 7000 steps a day on their pedometer, so as to get a healthy amount of exercise. On a certain evening, the person dances until the 7000 steps are reached.
Self-care
Loyalty
The person’s doctor says, “Please don’t change the dose of the medicine without talking with me first.” The person gets the urge to change the dose, but they contact the doctor to talk about it first.
Compliance
Kindness
The person is bothered by nightmares. The person decides to stop watching scary movies and instead read stories about people doing good things. The person practices imagining pleasant dreams while awake.
Positive fantasy rehearsal
Respectful talk
The person is driving the speed limit, and the person behind them gives a loud and long honk and an angry gesture because they want the person to go faster. The person thinks, “I’ll relax and let them be the only one of us who is upset. When I get a chance, I’ll pull over and let this person pass.”
A. Nonviolence and anger control
B. Joyousness
31. Someone has had a friend for a long time. The person tries to remember the person’s birthday and wish them a happy birthday when the day comes around.
A. Honesty
B. Loyalty
32. Someone wants to get good at math, but the math instruction at their school is not very good. The person buys a used math instruction book really cheaply, and they study it on their own, a lot.
A. Productivity
B. Loyalty
33. A person has a habit of binge-eating. The person practices imagining eating small to moderate meals and then stopping, and feeling very good about stopping.
A. Honesty
B. Positive fantasy rehearsal
34. A person has a habit of binge-eating. The person has eaten a moderate amount, and has the urge to keep going. But the person stops and brushes their teeth to signal to themselves that they are finished.
A. Self-discipline
B. Respectful talk
35. A person wants to save money on doing laundry. So each morning the person washes their clothes from the previous day, in the sink and in the shower, and hangs them up to dry.
A. Conservation
B. Fortitude
36. Someone notices that a new student has come to the school someone attends. The person introduces themselves to the new student and invites them to join them for lunch.
A. Conservation
B. Friendship-building
37. While someone does homework, the person purposely thinks things like, “Hooray, I’m getting a lot accomplished!” The person finds that the homework is much more pleasant because of such thoughts.
A. Honesty
B. Joyousness
38. Someone is having fun watching videos, but they stop so that they can go to bed on time and not be too sleepy the next day.
A. Self-discipline
B. Conservation
39. Someone feels nervous about reading aloud in front of people. But the person practices while alone, and then reads a report in front of people even though they were nervous.
A. Kindness
B. Courage
40. Someone joins an organization that tries to prevent nuclear war. The person works hard on trying to promote a treaty that would make nations agree that no one person in their country could decide to wage war – there would have to be a committee that deliberates and comes to the decision.
A. Joyousness
B. Nonviolence
41. There is a law that says that people of a certain race have to sit separately in the back of buses. A person is part of a movement to change this bad law, and the person sits in the section of the bus that the rule prohibits. This breaking of the rule turns out to be a good decision in getting the rule changed. (Deciding when NOT to follow a rule, as well as when to follow a rule, is part of this skill.)
A. Compliance
B. Joyousness
42. Someone has been elected to office in their state. The person’s nephew says, “I’m applying for a job with the state. Could you use your position to make sure I get it?” The person decides that doing this would get them both into a lot of trouble, and that the best thing for the nephew is for the office-holder to stay out of it. (Deciding when NOT to do something for a friend or family member is part of this skill.)
A. Loyalty
B. Fortitude
43. Someone’s spouse has a job, and the spouse works hard at it. The person frequently says to their spouse, “I really appreciate the hard work you do for our family and for the people you serve.”
A. Fortitude
B. Friendship-building
44. Someone lived in the same building with someone who smokes. The person tried various other options, and finally they bought a really good air filtering machine to put in their room, plus a supply of activated charcoal filters for it.
A. Joyousness
B. Self-care
45. Someone was hooked on cigarettes. The person quit smoking, and for a good while they felt very unpleasant withdrawal symptoms and cravings for cigarettes. But they gutted it out without smoking. Eventually these bad feelings went away.
A. Self-discipline
B. Respectful talk
46. Someone has a problem with anxiety. They learn about a book written about how to reduce anxiety, written by someone whom they think is well informed. They study this book very carefully and practice the exercises the book describes, very often.
A. Productivity
B. Nonviolence and anger control
47. Someone writes down their goals, and then the person spends time every day imagining themselves doing the behaviors that accomplish those goals.
A. Fortitude
B. Positive fantasy rehearsal
48. Someone volunteers at an animal shelter, and takes dogs out for walks and pets them.
A. Conservation
B. Kindness
49. Someone has the urge to buy a new coat. But the person decides to wait until the coat they already have gets more worn out.
A. Conservation
B. Kindness
50. Someone works at math and gets skilled enough at it that it is actually becomes fun for the person to solve math problems and to take sample math tests.
A. Honesty
B. Joyousness
51. Someone does some arithmetic and finds that smoking a pack of cigarettes a day for a year costs about $3000. They do more arithmetic and find that if they saved and invested that money instead, in 20 years they would accumulate over $120,000. They decide not to smoke for this reason.
A. Conservation
B. Respectful talk
52. Someone reads about the health consequences of smoking and finds that he is about 7 times more likely to die from lung cancer and 17 times more likely to die of emphysema if he smokes. He decides not to smoke for this reason.
A. Self-care
B. Compliance
53. Person 1 thought that Person 2 had agreed to do some work for Person 1, when Person 2 had not agreed to that. Person 1 writes a very insulting and angry email to Person 2 about this. Person 2 has the urge to write back in an insulting and angry way, but writes back in a way that calmly explains things.
A. Joyousness
B. Respectful talk
54. Someone invites all the people on their apartment floor over for a little get-together where they can get to know each other, even though the person is afraid that things will be awkward.
A. Honesty
B. Courage
55. Someone invites people on their apartment floor over for a get-together, and the person works hard at learning about the guests and introducing them to each other and trying to have them have a good time.
A. Friendship-building
B. Fortitude
56. Person 1 works in a building where Person 2 works, cleaning up the building. Person 1 introduces themselves to Person 2, says hi to them by name, and every once in a while chats with them.
A. Friendship-building
B. Nonviolence
57. Someone gets a bunch of test prep books and studies them very carefully and does a bunch of practice tests, for a long time, in order to get into a school that will help the person do the job the person wants to do.
A. Respectful talk
B. Productivity
58. Someone has a bunch of papers lying around on the floor. They need to go through each one of them and figure out what to do with it. Although this is not pleasant, the person stops putting it off and does it.
A. Self-discipline
B. Loyalty
59. Someone reads a long and detailed report about violence in the city they live in, and they spend time thinking about how they could help reduce shootings and stabbings there.
A. Friendship-building
B. Nonviolence
60. Someone thinks about the friends and family members that mean the most to them, and the person starts a custom of getting in touch and chatting by phone if not in person with each of these fairly often, and not forgetting about them.
A. Loyalty
B. Compliance
61. Someone has a job. The person reads and studies very often about how to do the job well. Then, the person practices in imagination the new skills they have learned from their studying.
A. Positive fantasy rehearsal
B. Kindness
62. Someone is trying to revise their computer file in a certain way, but the program won’t let them do it. They keep a cool head and think of various work-arounds, without getting upset. They figure out a way to get the job done.
A. Fortitude
B. Friendship-building
63. Someone is looking up evidence on whether or not something should be done. The person finds lots of evidence that agrees with what they already think. They spend some time looking for evidence that contradicts what they already think, so as not to select evidence in a biased way. (They are avoiding the “confirmation bias.”)
A. Nonviolence
B. Good decision-making
64. Someone wants to get stronger and more fit, but they don’t want to spend money on a gym. They look on the Internet for “bodyweight exercises,” and find out a bunch of exercises they can do at home for free.
A. Conservation
B. Loyalty
65. A person wants to get stronger and more fit, and they have found out a bunch of bodyweight exercises. They schedule a time and actually do the exercises every day, rather than just forgetting about them, even when it might be more fun to look around on the Internet.
A. Joyousness
B. Self-discipline
66. Someone submits an article for publication. It gets rejected, for what the person thinks are not good reasons. The person keeps a cool head, thinks about how to revise the article, does so, and submits it somewhere else.
A. Self-care
B. Fortitude
67. Two people are roommates. One of them wants to have private time with someone else in the room, and wants the other to go somewhere else during that time. The other doesn’t like being exiled from the room so much. They talk about it and list options. They decide to look for someone who travels out of town pretty often, and they work out a deal to use that person’s room some of the time, in a way that they can all be happy with.
A. Honesty
B. Good joint decisions
68. Someone is chatting with some other people, and the person thinks of some ways to joke around and be a little bit funny. The person finds that doing this is fun and that it makes the conversation more enjoyable.
A. Joyousness
B. Self-discipline
69. Someone tried out for a play, but didn’t get any part in it, but other people in the person’s neighborhood did get parts. The person thinks about going for a walk in the neighborhood, and realizes that they feel embarrassed about the possibility of seeing the people who made it into the play. But the person decides that if they see someone in the play they will act friendly and unashamed and unapologetic. They go for the walk anyway.
A. Nonviolence
B. Courage
70. Someone sees a TV program about how badly animals who are raised for food are treated. So the
person tries to find farmers and fishermen to buy from who try to make sure that the animals have
happy lives.
A. Kindness
B. Honesty
71. Someone is playing tennis with a friend. The friend thinks that a certain ball was out, which would
give the friend the point, whereas the person is very sure that it was in. The person thinks, “Whatever. It
doesn’t make any difference in the long run,” and just gives the friend the point.
A. Conservation
B. Fortitude